My Twitter account is growing at a rate of about 20 to 50 new followers a day.
I did not BUY them.
I did not use a service that promised to AUTOMATE them.
They grew ORGANICALLY!
Here's the reasons why:
I was just telling my daughter about the time I had the level 2 animal friend perk. Anyway... I was running around in a very open area, admiring the way my ass looked in recon power armor, when all the sudden I start getting pinged from laser blasts off in the distance. Before I could even look around and figure out where the shots were coming from an entire HERD of Yao Guai ran past me and mauled the poor little sentry robot to teeny weeny little itty bitty bits.
I was so amused.
It was one of those 'once in a lifetime' gaming moments that can never really be repeated.
So, after telling my daughter that story, I also told her about how my husband and I used to say "don't feed the Yao Guai" all the time when I was playing Fallout 3, like every day! (and admiring how my ass looked in recon power armor)
My daughter is an aspiring geeklet. We're going to be doing YouTube video's where she's the geeky little star. We're amassing a collection of geeky T-Shirts for her to wear on her show.
We would LOVE LOVE LOVE an official "Don't Feed the Yao Guai" T-Shirt.
If you actually make them, would you please do a kid size for her and some adult sizes for me and my husband? It would go great with the Vault 101 sneakers I just bought.
Much love,
a loyal fan...
@CompanionAnne
The following rant is in regard to my personal feelings on the topics of excessive breeding for religious reasons, gay marriage and the nature of homosexuality in general. If you are easy to offend on any of these topics, please read no further.
If you can respect that this is my blog, my feelings and my rules... than please, read on.
[NOTE: I could not figure out how to make the 'insert jump break' work to cut the post - so you're just going to have to live with not reading any further rather than clicking in to see the rant. Sorry!!]
I usually stay quiet about things like this. I've learned my lesson on speaking my mind. I stay out of the news and whatever mainstream media is hyping these days. One time, I re-posted an anti-Obama meme, to which one of my best and most trusted friends immediately screamed back RACIST, and promptly unfriended me. So, that was that, I learned to shut the hell up, because in all reality, it doesn't matter WHAT your personal views are, the moment you take them from private to public, you are going to catch hell from someone! I used to have a workplace rule that stated up front that I would never discuss religion, relationships or politics in the work place. As my blogging is essentially my job now, I believe I have crossed that over here as well.
I have a secret blog for my rants, and perhaps I should be posting this there, but I've made a personal choice to stand up against bullying of any kind, and this one hit my bully triggers.
<RANT>
Earlier today I came across this post as a trending topic on the book of faces...
I will admit, I reposted it because something in the article PISSED ME OFF!!
"No individual's sexual behavior and chosen lifestyle has the right to redefine marriage"
"CHOSEN!!! Utter BULLSHIT!!! Using ones vagina like a frakking clown car is a CHOICE. Homosexuality is NOT."
... and I was about as impressed as I expected to be. But, there were some things that stood out.
This sword, for starters:
I received this wonderful TARDIS necklace as a gift.
I can't even get in to delete my Flickr account, so I've deleted any link to it anywhere. Ever since it's inception I've never been able to log in to maintain the account... so F it.
It's official now... that project I promised MONTHS ago... has been launched.
This is the one I said I needed Little One's help on.
I just posted my first real significant content on the new blog.
The budget has been worked out and the next project is acquiring funding.
I'm TIRED right now though. Got the #LimboBrain. So I'll work on that more after I've had some sleep.
My sleep schedule is WAY off now. I had a caffeine overdose that threw me out of whack. There is a hell of a pile of dishes to be done.
Healthwise, I'm not doing well. I'm still experiencing radical weirdness with my INR. I'm not losing ANY weight because it's winter and that kills my only outlet for exercise. OH, and I'm diabetic again!
I guess I never really stopped being diabetic, but when I lost all the weight after my gastric bypass my pancreas began to function normally without the use of meds or insulin.
Also, my neck is way fucked up. I have an email in to my old chiropractor for advise on getting a new one. If I had the funds I'd just go back to him but the health care industry makes it impossible for chiropractors to support health insurance.
And that's it, all the good and the bad.
It's a good life, and I'm making the most of it.
A few days ago I was riding in the back of a cab and musing to myself silently... I found myself thinking about the appearance of Linda Hamilton in Syfy's Defiance.
"I came across time for you, Sarah. I love you. I always have."*Can you imagine what it was like for Sarah to be on the receiving end of that kind of devotion?
In an attempt to get my social media links to populate in a different area, I managed to break the pages list entirely...
It seems like ages ago...
The Beloved One and I lived in a bi-level apartment. I LOVED that place. The lower level was kitchen and living area. The upper level was two bedrooms and a bathroom. The Beloved One had his desk set up in the living area, and my 'office' was in the second bedroom. We used to call it the dungeon and the tower.
Anyway...
One day I was upstairs and curled up in bed with my laptop. The Beloved One came up to check in on me and bestow affection, as he is want to do frequently throughout the day.
After kisses he asked "whatcha watchin?"
"Dead Like Me."
"Dead Like Me?"
"No no, Dead Like Me."
"Hm, what's it about?"
"It's about a girl who get's killed by a toilet seat entering the atmosphere from the Mir Space Station. Then she's recruited to become a grim reaper."
*eyebrows raise*
"I'm only about 20 minutes into it, I can back it up!"
"Oh, sure." In his 'I'll stay for one episode and snuggle' voice.
...
We didn't leave the bed for the rest of the weekend, except for a brief interlude between seasons one and two where I demanded to go out to a diner for breakfast at 7am. We pounded down the entire thing, and LOVED every second of it.
...
Years later we still quote the funnies often in our daily conversations. These are inside jokes that have continued to amuse us quite a bit.
Sadly, it is no longer on Netflix instant. But, they do have the DVD's. Just a day or so ago we giggled heartily repeating "I have illegals in my bottom," in funny English accents.
Heh...
Guess what's next in my Netflix queue now.
... and having "Followers" is not the same thing as being Followed.
I'm really amused by the show Selfie. If you're a social media junkie like I am, you probably are too. While the show has been criticized as by some as being too annoying, it's a social media gold mine.
Our heroine is played by Karen Gillan, whom you might remember fondly as Doctor Who's Amy Pond. Eliza Dooley, is a self obsessed girl who is never more than inches from her cell phone and her social networks. She has an epiphany after a nasty bout of food poisoning in which she was left to suffer entirely alone because she had no actual friends. During the course of her misery, she reaches out to several people connected to her across various social media channels, only to have them message back with unsupportive words or outright taunts over her circumstance.
Eliza learns the hard way that being Friended, is not the same as having Friends.
*sigh*
Recently I've been hit with a similar epiphany.
After getting serious about blogging again I started to fully integrate myself back into the wide world of social media. I started communicating to the outside world in more than just Facebook status updates, but took to Twitter as well. I'm on everything else now too, but Facebook and Twitter are basically the social media dynamic duo. You get the social media holy trinity when you add in Google+. I digress...
After tweeting to a new TV show, I was really surprised when the show itself started following me on Twitter. I was all, 'Oh Cool, something famous FOLLOWS me'.
Time passes, and I aquire more followers.
I realize that I'm starting to get a lot of attention because I tweet about social media and social media marketing quite a bit. Other social media enthusiasts begin to connect with me. I'm elated.
Taking seriously the effect of one's social media reach in terms of actually gaining fans or professional contacts, I begin to look into the products and services that claim they will increase my twitter followers by the thousands, tens of thousands and even, oh yes, even by the HUNDREDS of thousands. Curious, and having been offered free trials, I check them out.
I'm ... what's the word? I'm usually so good with words. I'm speechless? I'm dumbfounded? I'm Offended? I'm downright fucking pissed off?
Some of these sites, services, apps, whatever actually troll the internet looking for hashtags and keywords in peoples tweets, and automatically, yes I said AUTOMATICALLY, favorite, follow and even send direct messages via Twitter.
What
The
FUCK
People
?????????
At what point did social media completely cease to be, oh I don't know, actually SOCIAL!
After this I started going over the mental list of some of my own recent favorites and follows. Like the TV show... Oh, and that community of runners (as in sports, as in running for sport, as in fun and EXERCISE) yeah, I'm talking to you! I tweeted that I was watching a string of connected HORROR MOVIES. You favorited my tweet only because it had the word 'marathon' in it.
And the rest of you bots that have been favoriting my tweet asking for actual HELP on something, and not offering a single shred of actual assistance. Yeah, you're NOT impressing me!
I have learned the hard way that having Followers is not the same as being Followed.
I'm not resolving to do anything about this. I'm not going to wage protests or boycotts or anything. I may be irritated by my so called 'followers' who are actually just spam bots... but what the hell right? Some people don't have my kind of free time and have to resort to bots to advertise. *shrug* whatever.
I'm just disheartened is all.
And those of you who are actually Flesh and Blood and Real People. I just want to take the time to say I love you, and to thank you for actually being there.
I was really caught off guard when the character of Elsa Mars (played by Jessica Lange) started belting out the song Life on Mars in the first episode of season four of American Horror Story.
This season brings us "Freak Show", set in 1952 Jupiter, Florida.
The performance caught me off guard because the song seemed out of place for 1952, as did the outfit Ms. Mars wore on stage.
You'll have to forgive me for my ignorance on this one. I do claim to be a David Bowie fan, but I'm only familiar with his work from about the mid to late 80's on. Life on Mars was released in 1973, the year of my birth.
Mildly intrigued, but not enough to investigate at the time, I moved on.
Then I caught Episode 7, Test of Strength, where the character of Jimmy Darling (played by Evan Peters) belts out his cover of Nirvana's Come As You Are. Now that one I KNEW didn't belong!
Prompted to actually investigate this time, I headed for the wikipedia and started searching.
I was amused to learn that the outfit worn by Ms. Mars while performing Life on Mars, is in fact the same one that David Bowie wore.
HAH!
To which I say: GOOD JOB SHOW!!
First there was the tragic death of Claire, my laptop computer.
She was rather lushly replaced by Victor earlier this month.
However!
Right about the time I acquired Victor, I learned about NaNoWriMo and EVERYTHING got put on hold because I had JUST managed to crawl out from about half a decades worth of writers block.
Queue debilitating health condition...
*facepalm*
My rat poison was amplified by the medication regimen I was placed on to combat my follicular yeast infection. This thinned out my blood to the point of massive black bruises and fountains of nose bleeds and even triggered a trip to the emergency room.
The side effect was I just felt like ass. I was tired, listless, depressed... bleh, meh and bletch...
By the second or third day of this, I threw in the towel and said no to the NaNoWriMo. There was just no way I was going to recover a word count in time. It was a blessing to at least be writing again.
I took some time to get my head back in the game and then took on the daunting task of cleaning out my email boxes from the accumulation that had occurred while I was sans a decent computer.
That out of the way... it's time to get back into the swing of thing and get my projects back on track. First thing on the list is to fix my Amanda Harris Blog. I found a beautiful blogger template but the original developer is portuguese. It's going to take me tapping all of my background in web design to do the workarounds necessary to fix the foreign language links and what not. From there I want to do some social media tidying and weeding. Then I'm going to put my Non-Profit back at the top of the list and work on publishing my EBook(s) second.
Sound like a plan?
Yep, works for me.
Right! Let's get to it then!
... and rawr...
BTW Charlie the Unicorn says hi.
Twitter changed to : @angelshrike
Facebook Page changed to: https://www.facebook.com/angelshrike.page
Blogger changed to: http://angelshrike.blogspot.com/
No worries, it's for a good reason this time.
I looked at laptops today. I don't have a specific computer picked out yet, but I've begun to realize that the ideal specs for my new machine have placed this thing way out of my price range.
That isn't to say that it would be horribly expensive. Just more than I can afford on my poverty budget of $20 a month towards personal items.
So, it seems as if I can either wait a while and hope that the end of year kickbacks will be enough to cover this thing, causing extreme delays in this project launch.
Or...
I can attempt to work on this horribly slow and glitchy piece of shit thing and lump my upgrade into the start up grant for the project.
*sigh*
I am extremely unhappy with either option.
~
In other news, my not quite so smart phone started being just less of a douche enough to download some actual apps. It's not enough for me to call it a real smart phone, but it's at least significantly less dumb.
~
It's times like these I really wish I had connections to generous benefactors.
And yes, in laymans terms I really did just say "I wish I had a sugar daddy."
I promiosed a big project update and a poll today, but that's not going to happen.
Reason being that I finally damaged my computer so badly that it can no longer be used.
It was already a hopeless case. The case was cracked in several places. The fan was busted and it frequently overheated to the point where it would just shut down. Then I sorta dropped it on its head and killed it.
... oops...
Anyway... I'm posting this from my phone. Go me.
I hope this gets resolved soon.
...
Oh, and kindly forgive my lack of a witty Jack Harkness gif to illustrate my mood.
...
...
...rawr
Um, yeah... I just said that.
Anyway, this is a general update post, but it also has some foreshadowing on my new project.
Up first, HEATH:
In the aftermath of my afternoon in the ER, whatever was up with my kidney's is done and over with. My INR isn't 100% on track because I skipped several days of my meds trying to get it down from "oh my god, I could bleed out at any second." I get it tested every Friday, so let's just hope that it all works out.
SKIN:
I don't know if it's hard water or what. I know it's not allergies or detergent or anything like that. But my skin is ITCHY!!! I was scratching so often and so hard that I was leaving long, deep bleeding furrows in my flesh. The Beloved One had a fear that I would either scratch myself bloody or contract some sort of weird staph infection if I didn't get it looked at.
As a result, I now have a dermatologist prescribed goo that I have to slime myself with regularly. It's basically mineral oil and white petroleum jelly with a tiny bit of medicine in it to combat the itchy.
So far I don't think the medicine itself is strong enough because I'm still just as itchy if not more. However, my skin is SO HYDRATED now! Once the stuff absorbs, my skin feels wonderful. So, this isn't so bad after all.
WEIGHT GAIN:
During the homeless crisis I gained a lot of weight. I know I'm only making it worse by using TONS of real sugar in my coffee and basically living a sedentary life. Don't worry... I'm working on it. Baby steps. First things first is tackling that sugar thing. But, um, UGH! The artificial stuff tastes SO nasty. (shudder)
THE ARROW IN MY KNEE:
I blame my friend Brandy, If it weren't for some random Facebook push about something awesome she did in the Game of Thrones Ascent game, I probably could have gone my whole life without descending back into the world of Facebook games again. *le sigh*
As it stands, I'm at something like level 98 or so and climbing in the game. And THEN I decided I needed something to do while my vassles were questing and such and I decided to look into simulation games. I have no gaming budget, so I have to go with what's free, otherwise I'd just give in to the Beloved One's demands that I stop Facebook gaming and play The Sims. Nevertheless, I did find a game called City Girl Life, where I play a recent college grad moving to New York City and making a name for herself. I get to decorate an apartment, work a job and wear cute clothes. It's mindless fun and I like it.
Now, I did also download a bunch of REAL games. Free to play, via Steam. BUT, I can't play any of them because my computer is falling apart. The case is cracked. The fan is broken. It randomly overheats and shuts off. If I try to game an actual game, the computer can only handle the extra strain on the processor for about twenty-minutes.
Getting a new computer is on the list. But there are are a lot of other things that are going to have to come first.
SOCIAL MEDIA:
I'm getting good at this social media thing. I'm getting retweeted by some pretty upscale entities. I think that's pretty bad ass. It's also a skill that is going to be seriously important in the upcoming months.
NEW PROJECT:
I'm still going to try to keep up with my project of building resource lists and posting about things that I'm passionate about, but this new project is very Little One-centric. It's a new BIG THING that will operate with me in the background and allow her to serve as the public face.
Step One is having something to call it. I've brainstormed a short list of names and I'm going to start a poll on Friday, October 3rd. This will give the poll a full week to run and then the Little One and are going to announce the winning name/label/title/whatchmacallit on the evening of Friday, October 10th. Hopefully I'll have the entire project off the ground by her birthday on the 16th.
Without going into too many details. It's essentially going to be an awareness campaign / non-profit organization. I hope it will eventually take on a life of it's own and become a movement.
In general it's just really cool to have a BIG project to work on again. It's also a mommy thing and gives the Little One and I something to do together while introducing her to the value of non-traditional 'work' rolls. She has a pretty niche brain. I'm not sure that a normal 9-5 job is what's exactly in the cards for her. Opening her up to a potential career path at an early age is just kinda bad ass.
#ThisIsWhyIRock
In an effort to continue compiling resources about topics I am passionate about, I'll be moving on from "Lovecraft for Kids" and taking up the next phase, Luciferian Witchcraft.
I was first introduced to Lucifer the Archangel in my early 20's, via Murder Mysteries, by Neil Gaiman in which Lucifer is portrayed not as the leader of any sort of rebellion, but rather the first angel to cry:
Blame the Beloved One for this.
Here I am, diligtly researching my next resources project, when he plays this on the big TV... and suddenly my post goes straight to hell.
Anyway...
This little gem comes to us from FOB Equestria, a band of Military Bronies out to end the stigma that MLP is just for girls.
I've also taken the liberty of finding the most epic t-shirt ever, and posting that here as well.
Geek Parenting
- Genre = Horror
- Sub-genre = Lovecraft for Kids
FIND! Littlest Lovecraft
Site features: The Call of the Cthulhu, and not yet available The Dunwich Horror. There are also links to a shop for T-Shirts and OMG Coloring Pages!!
Geek Parenting:
- Genre = Horror
- Sub-genre = Lovecraft for Kids
FIND! ToyVault - Cthulhu Collection
A sweet site with plushies and stuff!
Geek Parenting:
- Genre = Horror
- Sub-genre = Lovecraft for Kids
FIND! Where's My Shoggoth?
A young boy wants to take his pet shoggoth for a walk—but oh, no! The shoggoth has escaped! Fearing for the safety of the poor thing, the boy sets out to find it, accompanied only by a small black cat. On the way, they explore the rambling mansion and its grounds and encounter a number of creatures and demigods. Unfortunately, none are the shoggoth! Where, oh where, could his poor shoggoth be?
Geek Parenting:
- Genre = Horror
- Sub-genre = Lovecraft for Kids
FIND! Cliffourd the Big Red God (Mini Mythos)
Little Wilbur Whateley has a god.It's a big red god.Other folks have gods, too ...but Wilbur has the biggest, reddest god in Dunwich.<.i>Renowned Cthulhu Mythos aficionado Kenneth Hite retells H P Lovecraft's classic "The Dunwich Horror" in this story of childhood terror, with adorable* illustrations by Andy Hopp.Cliffourd the Big Red God features 32 pages of full-color illustration, and is sure to be a hit with the newest generation of Lovecraft fans and their parents. The third in the Mini Mythos series (after Where the Deep Ones Are and The Antarctic Express).* May not be adorable to all earthly species.
Geek Parenting:
- Genre = Horror
- Sub-genre = Lovecraft for Kids
FIND! Antarctic Express (Mini Mythos)
The Antarctic Express From outside came the sounds of whirring propellers and rumbling engines. I looked through my window and saw an airplane standing perfectly still in front of my house. Renowned Mythos aficionado Ken Hite retells H P Lovecraft's "At the Mountains of Madness" in this parody of classic children's literature. Late one evening after the city has gone to sleep, young Danforth boards the mysterious airplane that waits for him: the Antarctic Express bound for the South Pole. When he arrives, Professor Dyer offers the boy the chance to learn any thing he desires. The boy modestly asks to probe the depths of the eldritch city of the Old Ones. The request is granted. On the way his memory is lost while fleeing from the piping shrieks of the shoggoths. On Christmas Eve, the boy finds his memory of that whistling cry returns. For you see, all who visit the Old Ones' city forever hear the sound of the shoggoths. The Antarctic Express features 32 pages of full-color illustration, and is sure to be a hit with the newest generation of Lovecraft fans and their parents. Also look for Where the Deep Ones Are in the Mini Mythos series.Available @ Amazon
CTHULHU just loves children and their innocent souls, and since his appearance can be off-puttingAvailable at ToyVault
to new worshipers, we've made the soft & huggable MY FIRST CTHULHU showing the Embodiment of Malevolence when he was just a star-spawn!
MY FIRST CTHULHU is made from soft,
baby-friendly fabrics and is safety-checked
Great for older worshippers too!
Geek Parenting:
- Genre = Horror
- Sub-genre = Lovecraft for kids
FIND! Where the Deep One's Are (Mini Mythos)
"The Deep Ones croaked their terrible croaks and smacked their terrible lips and rolled their terrible eyes and waved their terrible flippers" Renowned Mythos aficionado Ken Hite retells H P Lovecraft's "The Shadow Over Innsmouth" in this parody of classic children's literature. After greedily yelling for more fish, young Bobby is sent to his bedroom without any supper at all. But Bobby escapes when the Manuxet River runs right through his room, carrying an old boat that takes him to a magical town full of fish and slimier things ... the town of Innsmouth. Will Bobby join the wild rumpus under the sea, and be crowned the most Deep One of all? Where the Deep Ones Are features 32 pages of full-color illustration by Andy Hopp, and is sure to be a hit with the newest generation of Lovecraft fans and their parents. The first in the Mini Mythos series.Available @ Amazon
Geek Parenting:
- Genre = Horror
- Sub-genre = Lovecraft for kids
FIND! Babys First Mythos
Available @ Amazon
As a geeky parent I feel it's my duty to expose the Little One to a variety of genre's. From Anime to Sci-Fi to Spec-Fi to Fantasy, and finally, to Horror. I will be posting links of my explorations in this regard as well as publishing guide pages for other geeky parents to follow.
First up -
- Genre = Horror
- Sub genre = Lovecraft for Kids.
FIND! Tales from Lovecraft Middle School
Website: http://www.lovecraftmiddleschool.com/
Listed @ Amazon.com
The Beloved One and I are watching TV while I diligently work on suckering my social media tentacles onto, well... everything! Overheard (because I'm not really paying attention) "That was the worst live funeral I ever live tweeted," which made me LOL because, social media (bitches). I went on the Google's to see if I could find out what that was from (my Google-Fu was not strong enough to find it, but) and found THIS instead.
I read the whole thing and LOL'd my ass off:
Read the whole thing HERE.
I'm currently adding the array of my social media links to my Blogger. I looked, and blogger didn't really have a widget that did this on it's own (to the extent of my liking). However, my background in web design gives me some unique skills in creating a work-around to make my own.
Challenge. I no longer own domain space to simply upload a cache of image files to the web.
Challenge. I don't want to upload an album of social media icons that I didn't create into one of my online galleries (i.e. pinterest or flickr)
Solution: (because I'm just this fucking good)
When I was about my daughters age, I got a fluffy blue unicorn blankie as a gift. I went out of my ever loven mind.
I THOUGHT the fluffy blue unicorn blankie had been lost during the homeless crisis. But, the Beloved One magically pulled it out of the bottom of a box one day. And I went out of my ever loven mind... well actually I didn't... but I was really happy to see it because now that is the family heirloom I can bequeath my daughter with.
Cause you see... my blankie has already kinda been replaced.
~~~
Around the time of my Birthday the Beloved One, the Little One and I were shopping and I saw a giant, fluffy (oh.my.god.it's.so.fluffy), royal blue blankie. It came home with me.
About a month ago, the Beloved One and I were shopping and I said "Ooo, what's that?" Spying a large, grey, fluffy object from halfway across the room. It turned out to be a giant rhino. A big, fluffy, pillow pet, giant rhino. Oh, here's a puppy. Hey look, I found a bear.
Hey what's that pink one?
OH MY GOD IT'S A GIANT UNICORN!!!
I went out of my ever loven, mother frakken mind. I HAD TO HAVE IT.
~~~
Now, I watch TV curled up in a love seat nest, leaning on my giant fluffy unicorn pillow, and curled up in my oh so fluffy blue blankie of doom.
The Beloved One has taken to sleeping on the couch because our bed isn't big enough for him, me and the unicorn.
I hug my unicorn, Charlie, daily.
So, after a considerable amount of time spent at the ER today. I was given a teeny, tiny, little, itty, bitty, half tab of a vitamin K pill and sent on my way with instructions to drink lots of water and get my INR checked tomorrow.
Many many many moons ago I was hospitalized with a pulmonary embolism.
I was hospitalized for a week.
Many many moons ago I was hospitalized with a saddle embolus.
Now the second one should have killed me, it was HUGE. However, I responded so well to the treatment that I was bagged, tagged and released back into the wild in less than three days.
It was, however, decided, after the second hospitalization that I would be on blood thinners for the rest of my life. This requires weekly blood tests to determine my INR.
In the last couple of months or so my INR has been all over the place. Too low (under 2.0) and I could be gifted with a lovely new blood clot and all that entails. Too high (over 3.0) and I'm in danger of bleeding out. Granted, I've been really shitty about taking my meds at the correct time, forgetting whether or not I've taken them, over-compensating for the possibility that I might not have taken them by taking more. Uh, yeah... anyway.
Lately I've been really really good though. On time, every day, correct dose and everything.
And yet...
Friday my INR was 8.5.
I was told not to worry unless I saw signs of bleeding.
Well, now I've noticed signs of bleeding.
The Beloved One is monitoring me. We're flushing my system with water and doing what we need to do. I am NOT worried. Like I said, I have a habit of not dying no matter how bad the medical prognosis is. I've survived way worse than this. Trust me.
Back when the Beloved One and I got our new place there was some excitement about catching up on missed shows. There was one new show in particular that caught my interest in it's trailers, but I hadn't had the means to check it out. Sadly, all available 'catch up on what you missed' options were missing the first two episodes.
In a fit of stupidity I decided to try torrents. Our old roommate torrented the hell out of shit all the fucking time without a problem, why couldn't I?
Erm... yeah...
Months of pop ups, slow browsers, and other weirdness later we decided it was time to dig out my old external hard drive, back up my important files, and scrub my whole computer clean.
And, of course - I was told - VERY EXPLICITLY - to NEVER DOWNLOAD ANYTHING EVER AGAIN.
Erm... yeah...
Did I mention the fact that I'm occasionally stupid?
~~~
I've been learning to get by with honest to goodness free, online - and other TRUSTED stuff. I found image editors online vs. using Adobe products. I have been using Google Docs or OpenOffice vs. Microsoft Office. And so on and so forth.
Hah - then I decided I needed a juxtaposed image to make a point, but my online image editors didn't seem to be able to work in layers.
Queue: quick internet search for free image editors
Queue: download and install
Queue: clicking the 'accept' button without reading what I was accepting
Queue: noticing I was clicking the 'accept' button without reading what I was accepting
Queue: ABSOLUTE AND COMPLETE PURE FUCKING PANIC
Oh... Oh... what have I done?
Queue: UnInstall
Queue: Delete
Queue: More PANIC
~~~
Natutally - my internet starts slowing down - my browsers stop working - panic panic panic.
So I Avast, I scrub, I scour,
Chrome won't load Facebook
Chrome won't load Netflix
Netflix tells me my Silverlight is corrupted.
Chrome won't download Silverlight without erroring out.
Clearly I have to kill Chrome right? Right?
Delete - UnInstall - (back up bookmarks first, of course)
~try to find Chrome again~
Firefox times out.
Opera times out.
I.E. times out.
Um... um... umm... more panic.
FINALLY - One of them downloads Chrome.
Queue: sign into Chrome
Chrome will not load Facebook
Chrome won't even download a damn theme!
~~~
Queue: Giving up completely and waiting for the Beloved One to wake up and fix it.
Queue: Trying to catch up on DVR shows and ignore the fact that I'm not being distracted enough because I don't have something in my lap.
Queue: Getting so bored I try again without waiting for the Beloved One to wake up.
QUEUE: CHROME SUDDENLY WORKING JUST MOTHER FUCKING FINE FOR NO APPARENT REASON!
Queue: *facepalm blog post*
So, it's been a bit of an identity crisis lately.
It started when I began to re-insert myself into the world of social media and online "life sharing" When I was choosing a Twitter username I realized I no longer felt connected to SarahAnneSmith40. Truthfully I always kinda hated it because of the '40', but when I was originally creating my Sarah Anne Smith online identity I had to get creative with the gmail address because it was kinda taken.
Anywho, (you see what I did there?)
The '40' was a promise that I made to myself. I swore that I would do something significant before I turned 41, and that basically didn't happen. Having the '40' there was a bit of a constant reminder of my failure.
The name Sarah Anne Smith was born out if a desire to sever myself completely from my blood family. The individual components of the name: Sarah, Anne and Smith were based on the alternates of my multiple personality disorder.
Now THERE is an interesting tidbit. That whole multiple personality thing. I'm not exactly sure just when my personalty transitioned from merely fractured to full on broken, but the voices in my head had become something more than just that. The really cool part is that they are me from five years in the future of my own time line. My perfect selves, realized.
Sarah is a survivalist, a warrior. Think Sarah Connor.
Anne is a sensual healer, a sex mage, a carnalmancer.
Smith is a web designer. Her real name, in my head, is Code Monkey.
Okay, but here's the thing.
I can't hear the voices anymore. I haven't for a long time. And I don't think that means I'm healed or cured. Quite the opposite in fact. Truth is, I'm more broken than ever.
I don't identify as a survivalist anymore. In fact, I just purged my Facebook friends list of anyone connected to military, law enforcement, tactical gear, firearms training or private citizen gun ownership. I went from over 300 friends to 82. I remember when I had big dreams of starting an empowerment course for domestic abuse survivors that placed 90% of it's empowerment emphasis on fire arms training. Yeah... that's all gone now.
I guess I could still be a healer if I weren't so broken. Not to mention the fact that the Beloved One keeps me so satisfied in the love, sex and relationships departments that I don't really have any desire to be polyamorous anymore.
And lastly, I don't identify as a web designer or a digital artist anymore. Truthfully, the back end standards are evolving so fast that I can't keep up, and maintaining the software necessary to achieve optimal output gets really damn impossible when on a very limited and fixed income.
I digress...
When picking my Twitter name I suddenly came up with the idea of Companion Anne. I've been Doctor Who'ing a lot lately and @CompanionAnne just had a nice ring to it.
Here's why it makes sense:
I've recently come into my identity/job title as a 'Companion'. (more on that later)
The Beloved One, the Little One and I all have individual profiles on our Netflix account. We all have very different tastes in entertainment. But the Beloved One and I also have a shared profile for things that we both enjoy and would watch together. He named it, simply, "The Couch".
Now, his nickname since the dawn of time has always been 'Doc'.
I am recently a 'companion'.
Our Netflix is one of our ways of exploring the universe and seeing new things. So, today I renamed our shared account "The T.A.R.D.I.S." I didn't tell him. I was saving it as a surprise. I knew he'd think it was cute the next time he logged into Netflix.
And yet, earlier today, probably only about an hour after I had done this, the Beloved One decided to name our blu-ray player.
I shit you not, without talking to me or having seen what I had done on Netflix,, he named it The Tardis. "Because it's bigger on the inide."
LOL
When two extremely nerdy people are so in love that they occasionally share a brain, the world becomes an amazing place to be alive.
